RUTH, THE WOMAN BEHIND BILLY GRAHAM

Different cultures of the world are chauvinistic. They recognise the contributions of the man without remembering and paying homage to the woman at the background who sacrificed so much to give the man the concentration and power he needed to surmount the challenges associated with his accomplishment. One wonders if Billy Graham would have attained his stature if he had a termagant for a wife. Show me a man who rose to world acclaim when his home is not at peace. The world must be ready to celebrate the wives of men who changed the world.

Below is a culled tribute to Ruth Bell Graham who kept the home, prayed and stood in the gap for Billy while he moved round the world winning souls for Christ. Ruth went to be with the Lord in 2007 and was buried in the Billy Graham Library.

“Billy Graham enjoyed 63 years of marriage to Ruth Graham and together they raised 5 children. When she died in 2007 he called her a “spiritual giant whose unparalleled knowledge of the Bible and commitment to prayer were a challenge and inspiration to everyone who knew her.”

“He also described her as his life partner. “We were called by God as a team,” he said. But Graham didn’t gloss over the challenges in his marriage. Instead, he was willing to talk about their struggles. He called them “happily compatible” and quoted his wife as saying “if two people agree on everything one of them is unnecessary.”

“In particular, Graham learned to live with his wife’s independent nature. A newspaper account describes how he tried to prevent her from driving after she wrecked the family car. When Ruth refused Billy said “I don’t recall reading in Scripture that Sarah ever talked to Abraham like that” and she responded “Well, I don’t recall reading in Scripture that Abraham ever tried to take Sarah’s camel away from her.”

Graham’s biggest regret perhaps is the time he spent away from Ruth and the children while traveling with the ministry. In 2008, he told Christianity Today “I’m sure Ruth and the children paid a heavy price for all the times I was absent. I always tell younger evangelists not to feel like they have to accept every invitation they get or be absent from home so much.”

One of Graham’s guiding principles may have helped to anchor their marriage while helping the ministry. His much-debated “Billy Graham Rule” came about early in his ministry and aimed to steer Graham and his associates from sexual temptations among others. As a result of following the rule, Graham never spent time alone with a woman other than Ruth.

Historian and Graham biographer Grant Wacker, a professor at Duke Divinity School, told National Public Radio “People who didn’t like Billy Graham spent alot of time trying to find personal violations of his moral and ethical code and they couldn’t. They didn’t exist. He was a man who maintained absolute marital fidelity and moral and financial integrity.”

Pictures of Billy Graham Contributions

“My wife, Ruth, was the most incredible woman I have ever known. Whenever I was asked to name the finest Christian I ever met, I always replied, ‘My wife, Ruth.’ She was a spiritual giant, whose unparalleled knowledge of the Bible and commitment to prayer were a challenge and inspiration to everyone who knew her. My favourite photograph shows her sitting on our front porch at sunrise, quietly reading her Bible and sipping coffee — her daily routine for many years. A night never went by, when we were together, without us holding hands and praying before we went to sleep.

“Ruth also was a wonderful mother. Her task wasn’t easy since I was away from home so much, but she handled our children with both great love and wise discipline. She felt it was her calling, and without her willingness to bear the major responsibility for raising our children, my work simply would not have been possible. She spent hours every week teaching them the Bible and praying with each of them. She also was full of fun, always ready to play a joke on someone. Our children all knew that life was never dull with Ruth around!

Funeral pictures of Billy Graham

“She was committed also to her church and her community. She was a devout churchwoman who loved her Presbyterian heritage, which came from her parents who were medical missionaries in China. She was friends with several presidents’ wives and had been received on occasion by Queen Elizabeth II, but whenever she heard of anyone in our community who had a need, she always was there to help with food or flowers or in other ways. Many people went to her for advice and counsel, or just to pray with her, and she was a close friend to the wives of many associates.

“Ruth loved sports and was quite athletic, although she rarely played athletic games herself. Years ago she was fixing a swing for some of our grandchildren, and when she climbed the tree to test the swing, it broke and she fell about 15 feet. She fractured several bones (including a crushed vertebra), and was never quite the same physically after that. For years she suffered severe back pain and was hospitalized here in Asheville and at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester because of this and other ailments. She was a gentle, smiling, and kind person whose primary goal was to live for Christ and reflect His love. In her last days she talked repeatedly of heaven, and although I will miss her more than I can possibly say, I rejoice that someday soon we will be reunited in the presence of the Lord she loved and served so faithfully.”
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Culled