In life, we realise some truths gradually. I have come to know that when you are a 'nobody', so many people treat you like one. Few are the people who
In life, we realise some truths gradually. I have come to know that when you are a ‘nobody’, so many people treat you like one. Few are the people who respect you for who you are. Some people want to know your substance, what you can offer before associating with you.
Nobody appreciates you in the days of your suffering. The banks don’t give loans on sympathy. Banks give loan when they know what you can offer. Let me tell you a story that unfolded on Whatsapp recently.
On Whatsapp, some people create groups to which they add people they regard as friends. If you are observant, you will notice that immediately some group are created and numbers added, some people immediately remove themselves and you will see notices on the groups like 08024247404 left 08057849480 left 08037195091 left. I have always wondered and pitied the persons who created these groups. How would they feel? I thought they added people they knew and call friends.
There was a guy who created a group and added about 140 people (numbers). In less than three hours, over 127 left.
When people add me to groups, I always ask who added me and what is the orientation and rules of the group. I always write to encourage people leaving to stay and let us network together. I believe so much in networking and making new friends. So i did when this guy added my number.
In that same group, I noticed that four of my friends were among the people who left. I reached them immediately to ask why. Three of them said they belong to too many groups already. One said he hated to be disturbed by the incessant notifications on Whatsapp. It’s a free world so I left them, but told them that I remain in the group, if not for anything, to boost the confidence of the guy who formed it and make him happy that some people still remain with him.
Not quite five days after, a famous character in Nigeria created a Whatsapp group. I did not notice the group until lately. Yesterday, I went through the names and numbers on the group and saw three of my same four friends there. I laughed.
I reached one of them immediately. “O boy, so you are in this group? “Yes. It was formed by Dr XYZ ” I know. I thought you said your phone is filled and you don’t need to belong to any more groups… “Well. I choose to stay here. I deleted myself from some groups to have space for this one.” I laughed.
Now, do you understand the drift? These guys left the first group because the creator was nobody to them. They remained in the new group because the guy was somebody. The choice to stay or not was really because the phone was full or they don’t want to be disturbed. In fact, he deleted himself from some groups to create room for his membership in the new group.
When I looked at all the contributions to the new group, people were celebrating their membership in the group. They were praying for the convener. They were expressing their delight and sense of privilege to belong to the man’s group. I did not see one single number left before it. NOT ONE NUMBER! That is life.
When you are a ‘nobody’, people treat you like one. When you are a ‘somebody’, people fight to be your friend. They struggle for your handshake. I speak to you my dear friend, work hard. Distinguish yourself in your field of endeavour. Make your contributions known.
Those people who call the shots around you, those people who lead others don’t have two heads. They were born just like you. The difference today is that they worked hard at one thing and got distinguished. Define your goal and work it. You will succeed. May you succeed. In Jesus name. . .
By Bola Adewara
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